In each episode, Andy and John will determine who among that saga’s figures is the most deserving of outlawry. The sentence may be minor outlawry (a period of three years’ exile) or full outlawry (a permanent removal from Iceland). This list contains some of the worst rogues, murderers, thieves, cheats, and villains in the sagas–except for the ones we decided we’d rather have on our side (see the “Thingmen” page). It also contains a few poor souls who simply ran afoul of powerful men, the Grágás laws, or our petty dislike. Third Quarter Court Results: Who deserves to be called “The Baddest Dude” in the Third Quarter?
The Saga of Gunnar the Fool of Keldugnup (Ep. 34): A great debate ensued between John and Andy over how to judge this category. In a heated argument, John insisted that Gunnar deserved to be named outlaw because of his killing of the Thorgrimssons and his handling of the troll family on the glaciers. Andy disagreed and preferred the corrupt family of Thorgrim, Grim, and Jokul. After much arguing a begrudging compromise was reached and for the first time ever, three characters were sent into exile with a sentence of minor outlawry. John stuck to his guns and sent Gunnar on his way. Andy also stuck to his guns and sent Grim and Jokul with him. The two hosts continued arguing off mic between sections. Neither was happy with the other’s stubbornness. The argument will be settled at Ragnarok.
The Saga of the Sworn Brothers (Ep. 33): Thorgeir. While there was discussion of several characters in the saga, the outcome of the outlawry section was never really in doubt. Thorgeir’s devotion to senseless and unprovoked killing is rare for saga protagonists. It doesn’t matter which manuscript you read, Thorgeir is a terrible person who deserved the sentence of full outlawry.
The Saga of Thord Menace (Ep. 32): Orm and Ozurr (both got only minor outlawry). There was some discussion of Thord’s activities, but ultimately the debate came down to Orm and Ozurr. When neither John nor Andy would budge, they reached a compromise that sent both Orm and Ozurr away with a sentence of minor outlawry.
The Saga of Bard the God of Snowfell (Ep. 31): Kolbjorn. When he isn’t allowed to take revenge on Gest directly, he decided to take out his anger on Gest’s half-brothers. He steals their sheep, lures them into the mountains, and then gets Thord to agree to a marriage with Solrun, a beautiful woman who he claims is his daughter but in reality is a kidnapped woman he intends to make into a sex-slave. When the brothers appear for the wedding, he has a meal prepared of human flesh and then tries to kill them. For livestock theft, kidnapping, mass murder, and attempted murder, Kolbjorn the Giant must go.
The Saga of Hord and the Holm-Dwellers (Ep.30): In most sagas, the main protagonist is fought over to be claimed as a Thingman. This is not one of those sagas. Hord behaves badly throughout much of the saga. He rejects the gift Illugi offers him on first meeting, snubbing it and demanding something better. He walks over people in his desire for goods and glory, entering and looting Sotti’s mound without much claim to it, and repeatedly targets the farms of his brothers-in-law to gain goods, going so far as to attempt to burn Illugi and his sister Thorbjorg in their house. The key event that leads us to turn on him though, is when he learns that Aud has sought help from Torvi to seek compensation for the killing of his son, Sigurd, instead of dealing with Hord directly. Upon heading this, Hord flies into a rage, kills Aud, the farmhand who witnessed it, and then sets the buildings of the farm ablaze. In a saga that includes murder over unauthorized horse grazing and attempted infanticide, Hord’s despicable deeds let him stand above (below?) the crowd. He can take his band of outlaws and leave Iceland. Forever. Now.
The Saga of Egil Skallagrimsson (Ep. 29): This was a difficult choice, because while there was no shortage of villains in this saga, most of them live in other places and so are not subject to Icelandic Law. After much discussion regarding the comparative virtues of homicide, general will to cause mayhem, and bovine trespass, the decision was made.
For multiple charges of child murder, Skallagrim Kveldulfsson has been given the charge of outlawry, and is to only be allowed back in Iceland with the permission of Thord Granisson, the father of one of the children he killed.
The “Saga” Of Ale-Hood (Ep.28): In a saga without any bloodshed and equally deficient in body count, there really was no clear list of contenders for Outlawry. While the chieftains were set up to be greedy and corrupt, in a late saga that only really serves to back up their positions as leaders and powerful men. While there are accusations of cattle rustling, there’s also no evidence to corroborate those claims. In the end, we had to go with the laws of Iceland itself, and give the sentence to Thorhall Ale-Hood for criminal neglect in failing to prevent the burning of a forest. While usually subject to a fine, the aggrieved parties can push for a harsher punishment. Since his inaction resulted in property damage, but no malicious intent, we feel that we can only give out minor outlawry this time. Ale-Hood, take your cut-rate brew and leave the district.
The Saga of the People of Floi (Ep. 27): In a saga which includes acts such as hiring a slave as a hit-man and the slaying or a horse to get into a kiddie murder-cult, it would take a truly ignoble act to sink to the bottom of the heap. Thankfully (?) the author provides us with Thorarinn the Foreman. A truly ignoble man, while Thorgils and some others are away searching for supplies or a way off of Greenland after the rise of the living dead, Thorarinn leads the remaining party away from camp, but not before taking the last of the party’s stores and murdering a recovering invalid before leaving her infant son to suckle on the gore. Stay in Greenland, because you aren’t wanted ’round these parts.
The Saga of the People of Kjalarnes (Ep. 26): While we could accept and attempt to justify Bui’s rationale for committing murder and arson, his treatment of Olof the Fair was more than we could take. The abduction, impregnation, and then abandonment of Olof because she was sexually assaulted by Kolfinn (while he was away spending a cozy winter in Norway with Frid the giantess), is not something we can condone. The fact that he then refuses to acknowledge Jokull as his and Frid’s son just adds to his guilt in our eyes. For the murder of Thorstein in the temple of Thor, arson (in regards to the aforementioned temple), and general bad treatment of the women in his life, Bui Andridson has been sentenced to outlawry.
The Saga of Ref the Sly (Ep. 25): For the crimes of unlawful grazing, animal trespass, manslaughter in the killing of Bard the Short, Thorgeir is now forced to grab his wife and set sail for Greenland, as there is nowhere in Iceland he hasn’t been outlawed from.
Second Quarter Court Results (Ep. 24): While Hallgerð Long-Legs and Morð Valgardsson of Njals saga provided a nail-biting race for second place, it is Freydis Eiriksdottir for her Slaughter of the Innocents in The Saga of the Greenlanders who gets voted out of Iceland for good! What practical effect this has on a Greenlander is uncertain, but the jury has spoken. Whatever island we’re on, she’s not welcome.
The Saga of the Sons of Droplaug (Ep. 23): Thorvald Ingjaldsson did a nice job tangling us up on this one. There were arguments to outlaw both of the Droplaugarson brothers, but John and Andy agreed that neither one really deserved it (possibly in the hopes of preserving them both for thingman???). That left their mother, Droplaug, and the man who slandered her, Thorgrim Dung-Beetle.
The Saga of the People of Vopnafjord (Ep. 22): We wanted to like you, Brodd-Helgi. We really did. But you had to go and act like a total bastard. I hope you’re not surprised by your sentence of outlawry. How could you not see this coming? To think, Andy once hoped to make you his thingman… Shame on you, Brodd-Helgi. Shame.
The Saga of Thorstein the White (Ep. 21): There were a few candidates to consider in this wee-little saga, but Einar Thorisson earned our ire for being an instigator and loudmouth. Aside from setting the action in motion by stealing Helga from Thorstein the Fair, he also made fun of Thorstein for having scurvy…in front of Norwegians no less! Not the kind of guy we want around. Off you go, Einar Thorisson!
Njal’s Saga (Ep. 20): Andy and John had trouble coming to an agreement on this one. John felt that Mord Valgardsson had done enough to emerge as the true villain of the saga. Andy argued that Mord’s motivations are at least understandable and that his villainy depends largely upon one’s perspective. John disagreed. Andy offered Hallgerd Long-legs as the true villain of the saga because her motivations are far more selfish and inexplicable. He argued that her nefarious deeds lead to far more violence, death, and regional instability. When your noble hosts couldn’t come to an agreement, John suggested that both Mord and Hallgerd be given a sentence of outlawry. Against Andy’s better judgment, he agreed to John’s offer.
The Saga of the People of Reykjadal and Killer-Skuta (Ep. 19): While John tried to “throw shade,” as they say, at Thorgeir the goði, there was no doubting who most deserved outlawry. For the bulk of our first summary episode, we recounted the many crimes of Vemund Fringe, nephew of the influential Askel. Though Askel stepped in time and time again to save Vemund and put him on the right path, the foolish Vemund just couldn’t help himself. Without Askel’s help, Vemund would have been outlawed within the saga itself on more than one occasion. But the long hand of Saga Thing justice can’t be influenced by his powerful Uncle Askel. We reached back through the centuries and gave Vemund the outlawry he deserved.
The Saga of Finnbogi the Strong (Ep. 18): There was only one real candidate for outlawry, according to Andy. If you’re looking for a true villain in this saga, you need look no further than Jokul Ingimundarson. He pursues a pointless and petty vendetta against Finnbogi for much of the saga, sending an impressive number of assassins to their death at Finnbogi’s hand. He’s thoroughly unlikable and worthy of outlawry. Then John reminded Andy about Thorvald Moðskegg, who brutally murdered Finnbogi’s children, Alf and Gunnbjorn, after they teased him too much. It’s worth noting that Thorvald is also a known shape-shifter. John floated the idea of outlawing both Jokul and Thorvald, but Andy didn’t feel comfortable breaking with custom. Despite Jokul’s awfulness, both Andy and John agreed that Thorvald’s slaying of Finnbogi’s young children was worthy of outlawry.
The Saga of the Greenlanders (Ep. 17): There was no debate here. There was only one villain in this saga, Freydis Eiriksdottir, and she did her very best to convince us that she deserved a sentence of outlawry. It turns out that bringing a ship full of men to the New World and then murdering them and their female companions in cold blood is just what it takes to get that sentence. She was a very persuasive lady.
Grettir’s Saga (Ep. 16): Sure Grettir is a problematic figure. Some of you even encouraged us to outlaw the eponymous character in our judgments. But how could we? Instead, our attention turned to Thorbjorn Hook, Grettir’s slayer. Not only does he encourage the use of witchcraft to get the upper hand over Grettir, he’s also a coward, a creep and a liar. I’d say he earned his sentence of outlawry. Here’s hoping Thorstein Drommund can track him down and finish the job.
Quarter Court (Ep. 15): Poll Results
Thorolf Twistfoot went up against some pretty nasty characters, like Eirik the Red, Hen Thorir, and Thord Kolbeinsson. But Thorolf won easily as the nastiest of all with 30% of the vote.
Narfi – from Kormak’s Saga 20%
Hen-Thorir – from Hen Thorir’s Saga 18.75%
Eirik the Red – from Eirik the Red’s Saga 15%
Thorolf Twistfoot – from Eyrbyggja Saga 30%
Vatnsdœla Saga (Ep. 14): John may have insisted on surveying the saga for multiple candidates (to be fair, there were a lot of villains in this saga), but there was only ever one true outlaw in this saga: Hrolleif. He earned it by causing trouble wherever he went, despite the efforts of his kinsmen and friends to make him feel welcome in the district. The final straw was his decision to use the august Ingimund the Old as a target. We can’t have guys like Hrolleif running around. Fortunately, his evil mother goes where he goes.
Viglund’s Saga (Ep. 13): While Einar and Jokul may have sought to have their way with the noble Olof and spent a bit too much time behind a haystack waiting to ambush Viglund, they clearly weren’t the brains behind the operation. It’s been a while since we’ve seen a female as truly evil as their mother, Thorbjorg. In addition to plotting Viglund’s death, she’s also a lousy mother to Ketilrid and a shrewish brute to her husband, Holmkel. She earned full outlawry.
The Saga of Bjorn Champion of the Hitardal People (Ep. 12): Thord Kolbeinsson is one of the more unlikable figures we’ve met in the sagas so far. He’s got the cowardly and bitter nature of Narfi and the manipulative talents of Hen-Thorir. He bullies a young Bjorn, steals Bjorn’s bride, and relentlessly pursues Bjorn’s death over the course of decades. Thord captures the very essence of shameful behavior in saga age Iceland and deserves his sentence of full outlawry.
Kormak’s Saga (Ep. 11): The lowly scoundrel Narfi earned his outlawry by sticking his nose where it didn’t belong once too often. He’s the cause of a lot of bloodshed, but never actually kills anyone himself. For such a conniving weasel, he never really accomplishes much, nor does he commit any major crimes. Sadly, we could thus only justify giving him minor outlawry. We trust that he’ll get himself killed while in exile.
Hallfred Troublesome-Poet’s Saga (Ep. 10): This saga had a lot of worthy candidates, like Sokki “we’re after your life and your goods” the Viking and Onund the thief/draugr. Unfortunately, they committed their crimes outside of Iceland and thus outside our jurisdiction. That was a bummer to realize. There wasn’t a lot of action in Iceland this time around, but we did get the sudden and violent assassination of Galti, Hallfred’s brother, at the Hunavatn Thing. Because we understood his motivation, we sentenced Brand Avaldason to minor outlwary.
Gunnlaug Serpent-Tongue’s saga (Ep. 9): Faced with no real villains in this saga (but a lot of obnoxious and unethical behavior), we found ourselves at an impasse. So, in an unprecedented but Solomon-like split decision, Gunnlaug Serpent-Tongue and Hrafn the Skald were both sentenced to minor outlawry for their various minor crimes. Hopefully they’ll use their three years abroad constructively and not spend the entire time tracking each other down across Scandinavia to finish their duel.
Bandamanna saga (Ep. 8): As the only identified (and non-supernatural) murderer in the saga, it was always going to be hard for Ospak Glumsson to avoid outlawry. His sentence is also in part a condemnation of Ospak’s paternal family, since his grandfather (the Ospak of Eyrbyggja saga) escaped being outlawed only because we felt obligated to outlaw the monumentally evil Thorolf Twist-Foot.
Saga of Ragnar Lothbrok and His Sons (Ep. 7): As this was a special episode, we did not take the saga to the thing as usual. If we had, it would have been a hard choice. Lagertha seems like a good candidate, but she’s from Saxo Grammaticus’ Gesta Danorum. So, let’s just say she got lucky.
Hen-Thorir’s Saga (Ep. 6): Well, we predicted at the end of our Eirik’s Saga episode that ol’ Eirik wouldn’t be the last title character to be outlawed at the Saga Thing. It certainly didn’t take long to fulfill that prophecy. If you’ve read Hen-Thorir’s Saga or just listened to our episode, then you know how despicable, petty, and lame Hen-Thorir really is. There are few characters in saga literature that Andy likes less than Hen-Thorir, a man nicknamed for the chickens he lugged about as a merchant. This guy earns his outlawry not so much for his evil deeds as for his general unlikableness.
Gisli’s saga Sursson (Ep. 5): The evidence for this one was circumstantial and possibly a little controversial, but John and Andy agreed that the murderer of Vestein Vesteinsson was, in all probability, Thorkel Sursson–and, after a bit of debate, decided that he was more deserving of outlawry than his brother Gisli.
Eirik the Red’s saga (Ep. 4): For the first time (but probably not the last), the eponymous figure of a saga proves to be the worst person in it. Eirik the Red, known for his policy of dividing his neighbors into “people I’m going to kill” and “people I might decide to kill later,” was thrown out of both Norway and Iceland–and now he’s been outlawed from the Saga Thing as well.
Eyrbyggja saga (Ep. 3): Without question, Thorolf Twist-Foot is the worst of a bunch of strong candidates for outlawry. Anyone who actually gets worse after his death is definitely someone we’d rather not have living in the neighborhood!
Hrafnkel’s saga (Ep. 2): Einar Thorbjarnason, sentenced to a minor outlawry for oathbreaking. Let this be a lesson to you, Einar–don’t ride Frey’s horse without permission!